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Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Marriage conversations silence

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Marriage conversations silence

Communication between partners as a marriage is breaking down can be varied. The type of communication that gets the most obvious attention is anger and fighting. Fighting, arguing and general viciousness to one another are some of most common talking points on marriage discussion forums and boards. Its easy to give the loudness and most obvious sign of trouble all of the attention. After all, its very noticeable, obviously hurtful to everyone around and inevitably an easy target for discussion. It isn’t, however, the most common breakdown in communication.

Communication Breakdowns

For many couples, there is very little, if any, of the anger and fighting that is a hallmark of a relationship in trouble. Instead, that highly visible issue is dwarfed by the deafening silence of a lack of any communication at all. A couple who fights is still relating to one another, albeit badly and negatively, but a couple who spend their everyday lives without acknowledging the other is avoiding any relation at all.

In order to break the cycle of living with a ghost, you first have to get your partner’s attention. If you’ve been trying to get your spouse’s attention the same way that you’ve been trying to, unsuccessfully, for so long then it’s time to change things up. Try sending your partner notes or letters, emails or voicemails. Don’t try to start a conversation during moments where there are enough distractions to help them continue to tune you out such as in front of the TV.

Look for inventive ways to get your partner’s attention and get relating again.

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